Today just felt like a good day to post another pic. I made this my tiled background on my laptop. Looks odd, but I like it.

Update from that new job situation. I'm only allowed to earn a certain amount on summer work study, and the way things look now, I can't work at the library and the new job with the hours that I wanted to at first, and still try to chase after a commission based job on campus (which I finally interviewed for on Friday). Discovering such depressing info on the Friday of the only three day weekend of the quarter didn't place me into the best mood, but I went with it. The grad party that was thrown in honor of my cousins went fine, a laid back family function that started 2 hours late, that ended up being a trip out to the movies by the end of the night. I got like 15 billion papers due this week, plus Kanye West is going to be on campus this Thursday, and I happened to schedule a group meeting at the exact same time he hits the stage. Maybe if things are in order we can crunch out the info in 30 minutes so that I can go see him on stage. Its not too often when you get an entertainer of his calibur to come to the University of Cincinnati, for a free performance. Then again, Coretta Scott King is going to be here as the graduation speaker in a couple of weeks. I wonder if she knows that Cincinnati needs some serious healing right now.
Digression...
With some planning and rescheduling of hours, I think that this work study issue can be worked out. Now if it would only stop raining outside. Then again this can be a good time to get some work done, I can't say that anything outside is distracting me.

 

Yay! Starting next month, I'm going go be working here as a work-study student, as well as at Langsam Library during the Summer Quarter. Went for the interview this past Friday, and it went well, plus it was brief, only a half an hour. I've been so caught up in getting all these assignments done that I haven't had the chance to get relatively excited about going to Montreal next month. Actually two weeks from Sunday. Plus I'm trying to get a commission based job, and do some internship work with a local music company this summer. I'm (trying to get) on a mission!!!

I was extremely excited to see my cousins grad last night. Mekaeila and Dalkesha both went to Hughes Center, which is across the street from where I am. It was great to go to a graduation ceremony, the last one I been to was for my cousin Troy and friend Mauriel back in 2001. They went to the same school also. From all the shouting and screaming that all of us did last night, I'm surprised that anyone of us isn't hoarse. It was just so energetic to be in the Cintas Center, cheering the both of them on, makes me look that much forward to mines in December, hopefully in December. It better be in December, the word gets around quick in my family. Just last Thursday, another one of my cousins was on campus promoting her job at a plasma care facility. One of the first things she said to me was "I heard you were graduating this December..." I responded with a "Dang, the word gets out quick! I just told my Mom just two weeks ago". And I heard that she had just moved out from her parent's place and has an apartment now. She told me that she just moved out like a week ago when I saw her. Thus, further proving my point that gossip gets out quick, at least on my Mom's side of the family.

Back to the graduation stuff from last night. My Aunt and Grandma were on some other stuff, to say the least, when neither one of them decided to go to the ceremony. And my Aunt came up here from Alabama. Enough said. I'm going to have to begin giving people ultimatum now in preparation for mines. If you're acting an ass, you can't go. If you copped an attitude over my cousin's graduation, you can't be there for neither one of mines. I already know now that I don't have the time or the patience to deal with someone acting a fool and waste a ticket when it can go to someone else who seriously gives a crap. So to keep from hearing anyone gripe and complain last night, a few of us (Mekaeila, here little sister, K'nya, our other cousin, I'yanna, my mom and myself) went out to Applebee's for a celebration dinner. The service was bad, but the food was good. I finally got to try that Blue cheese Sirloin steak they constantly showed on the commercials, for what seemed like an eternity. Which reminds me, that's going to be my snack when I get home this evening.

So, all and all, it was a great evening, and the energy was off the charts! Too bad that enthusiasm didn't carry over into today, not yet anyways, and it's already 3:21 in the afternoon. For now I must continue with the rest of the papers I have to type and group projects to collaborate on. At least this weekend coming up is Memorial Day weekend and I get Monday off to relax and get some work done. Knowing me, I'll probably be out shopping for that Montreal trip. :)
(Procrastination: "That's how I got through high school.")

Congrats to all the 2004 grads this year! You know who you are!

I've been meaning to post this pic to archive my whereabouts this quarter. I met Jerry Springer on campus in the newly remodeled (which I know some of my tution went to; they don't say that 'UC stands for Under Construction' for nothing!) Tangeman Center. It was weird that I met him cuz I was just watching his tv show that morning, then met him 90 minutes later. Actually it was quite cool. Call me a nerd for that one, I don't really care. 

This is one of the days where my horoscope seems to be on point:

My Horoscope (Cancer):
Thursday 20 May
Today marks the start of an extremely creative and imaginative four week period for you. It’s time to start listening to your intuition, and trusting your hunches – and it’s also time to start expressing your feelings through some kind of art, crafts or writing. If you want to reorganise or redecorate your bedroom, this is also the perfect day to plan a stylish but practical solution.
www.bbc.co.uk

Must...post...links

Paul
Tala

The links above are from two friends from hs- they have blogs too. Thank you Tala for them. I'm gonna post them at the top soon, once I get a minute to do so. This midquarter burnout is hell. I need a nap...

Diddy Disbands 'Making The Band' Group

That finale on Thursday was shocking. I felt bad for Da Band. Its sad how they went from hella hungry in the first and second seasons to all the overblown drama and egotrippin in the third. Just watching the show taught me what not to do in a group situation.

And now, it's the sixth week of classes. Only got about a month to go before finals. By then I will be tired from all the presentations and papers that I must type. I'm thinking of starting a typing business this summer so that way I can at least get paid for something that I do all the time anyways. Just provide a service to people in the neighborhood; it'll save me from the job hunt for the time being if I get this done by the time I leave for Montreal on June 13th.

Updates on the usual stuff I discuss:

School: I'm actually going to finish in December! So I will get the best Christmas gift afterall, my degree. Getting more hyped about the Montreal trip as the weeks go by. :)
Love: This definitely classifies as a WTF issue. Not much going on. Talking to a few guys cuz I'm bored. Only want 2 of them (not at the same time, that's so not my thing). Would like to settle, but not right now. Hey, I'm in my 20's I'll save the marriage thing for later. Time to mingle!
Work: Still gonna work at Langsam Library until the end of the year. May have an internship pending, depends on the company's needs. Looking for a second job, possibly a third. Hoping to make the typing services my hustle for the summer. Searching for a job sucks!
Dreams: Still want to be a songwriter/singer. Have to learn how to sing in front of people on the spot, never know what could happen. For now, I'm still writing things here and there, and getting my voice on point (i.e. singing songs that are in my key, like Monica, Brandy, etc.)
Etc.: Want to move out the house, but on good terms with my Mom. I hate fighting with her, its frustrating and so unnecessary at times.

This is a little something that I wrote in my mini notebook one night after being out with friends. I forgot to scan it, but it due time, it will be posted. Here's the actual text of what I wrote in the notebook:

4.26.04
I question my maturity sometimes. What makes it even worse it that I'm questioning it at 4:30 am Monday. I look at the people that I grew up with - even the ones I lost contact w/ and just been seeing them recently (just running into them & what not). I look @ everyone else around me and feel like they look their age. Not necessairly act it all the time (kids @ heart, no insults). I'm 21, feeling 16 and look 18, 19 on a good day. The logic is all screwed up on that one. Maybe its just the insomnia & insecurities speaking right now but I feel naive & gullable about life, and I'm about 2B 22 in 2 months. [It's too early/too late to ponder such deep thoughts.] It has a lot 2 do w/ my upbringing. Quite diciplined & structured to the point of asking if it was necessary. I was a good child. Parents were just overprotective. Maybe a bit too much. So when I finally became of age 2 do a couple things, I felt like I was lookin @ the word with a pair of fresh eyes: Perspective was altered immediately (kinda). Maybe not that instantly but it changed. There's something profound that I want 2 say, but that's out the window now. It's 4:40 am. It's hard 2B profound this late @nite/ this early in the AM. Maybe I can sleep better after writing this down. Lets hope so.

End: 4:41am

Let's see, it's been three weeks since I've began spring clasees. It's a shame how my world revolves around when the school quarters begin. Really, its not all that sad, because this is the life that I chose for myself. In a way, I'm gonna hate to see it go, that is, if I'm really up for graduating in December. It all boils down to one class, the capstone (final) class for my Family Business/Entrepreneurship minor. If it's offered in the fall, then I will have my BBA as the sweetest Christmas present ever, and if it's offered in the Winter or Spring in 05, then that means I can have the degree a early birthday gift.

For the time being, I'm just trying to adjust to taking 19 credits hours of courses this quarter, which I vowed that I would never do in my entire tenure as a college student. Once the tuition has made an official increase for the 04-05 academic year, that swayed me to take on another class instead of taking a third in the summer and paying out of pocket for, or wearing myself down in my possibly final quarter in the fall.

And then the Real World kicks in. Not the tv show, the part of my life where I have to decide on what I want to do for a living, at least for the next 5 years. I'm unsure if there are any people nowadays that stay with one company for 30 years or more. In the generations past, that's how things were, but now people change jobs like they change their drawls (yea drawls, not drawers). These four and some years went by like the previous four years that I endured, also known as high school to many. Sometimes I like to call it hell, cuz I went through many life changing events between 1996 and 2000 in my personal life and school life that it altered my outlook to an extent.

To sum it all up: I just want to find a good career that I won't have to dread going to five days a week.

Somehow the Friday Five from 4-9 (My girl Dezzy's birthday) fits in with this career and school discussion, somewhat anyways:

1. What do you do for a living? I'm a student. I work p-t though, on campus @ the library.

2. What do you like most about your job? The flexibility, I'm going to miss that when I have to find a f-t position somewhere.

3. What do you like least about your job? The occasional gruntwork. Then again, my position is the Student Assistant. So that's what I end up with.

4. When you have a bad day at work it's usually because _____... I'm sick or really tired.

5. What other career(s) are you interested in? Anything creative that's in the music industry. I wanna shine, baby. :)

For now, instead of pondering all of life's questions about my future, I'm gonna go and relax. It's a beautiful day out, and I got my bags packed for yet another road trip. This time, I'm headed to Jersey and NYC for 2 days. Supposed to have been 3 days but things occur for a reason. I'm excited about getting out the state once again! Happy weekend to the 5 people that read this, if that many. I may make a out of town post once I get settled in in Jersey early Saturday morning.


An update to the post from March 14th: I got selected to participate in Study Abroad! I go to Montreal for a week in June! :D Now, that's something to celebrate. Plus, its not that official yet, but I may have an summer internship too, I promised the lady that I interviewed with that I would keep in contact with her during this quarter to let her know of my summer whereabouts. I could definately use the extra money, especially when I get my L's. I'm shooting for a Memorial Day deadline for that one. Now I wonder why I missed all of this in the paragraphs above. Oh well.

Tuition increased maximum amount
Great, now I'm gonna be in more in debt.

Is there another word for being past busy? How about just plain lazy? Or tired perhaps? Well, whatever the case, I've been away for another long while. Classes have been keeping me busy among other things. Kinda dating this guy, but he doesn't have a phone, his brother has it now. I don't know what type of sense that makes, but its not serious anyways. Haven't heard from him in two weeks. That's okay, I'm not in shock or anything. I do have a long time crush to holla at. Because my friend made me realize that catching crushes is the hot thing to do for 2004. She caught hers, so now I'm inspired to catch mines, after all this time. Hey, I can write a song about that! :)

I was hoping to do some creative things, like helping to contribute to a play, but those plans fell through for now. Then there was the whole starting a girl group with two of my friends. Then that fell through before it began, because of or disagreement on management before things even jumped off. They still my hearts though, but we came to the conclusion to agree to disagree on that issue, and made a pact to be supportive of whatever each of us decide to do musically. Actually we made that pact from the get go, but its just more prominent now, ya know. I tried to take my driver's test last Saturday (3/6) and messed up on the manuevering through the cones, which sucked. I am scheduled to go back on Tuesday and my "buddy for all times" has been helping me practice, and I love her for that, especially all the rough spots we've been through over the years (try: not speaking for 6 years, then you'll understand). Some people (like me for example) don't know how much someone is down for you until they come back into your life. It humbles you a lot. I'm not saying that I wasn't humble before, but much more grateful of the people who choose to be in my life. Okay, that's my profound moment for this entry. :-) I just want to get through finals this week! I have two that I have to attend, one on Tuesday and one Wednesday. But there's a take home, open book exam that I have for one of my classes that's due by Friday morning. It's for the Legal Aspects of Entrepreneurship that I'm in. The class is kinda confusing, but then again its about Business Law for small business owners, which is tricky enough in its own right. I'm glad that I changed my mind about going to school to be a lawyer, I think that the terminology alone would have killed me. Not saying that being in the College of Business is any easier. Its frightening in a way, because I may be able to graduate this December! This December, that's a big change from graduating in the Spring of 2005. If I am able to push up my last class (aka Capstone) for my minor in Entrepreneurial Studies/Family Business, I may be actually able to walk in December!!! That's hella frightening to me, because I want to do a few more things upon exiting the University of Cincinnati:
1. Get an internships somewhere!
2. Study abroad- if they still accept my application, granted that I forgot to turn it in Friday!
3. Breathe, take another good vacation or something to clear my mind and get focused
4. Do something musically- actually get a song heard, network, something!!!

I don't know if I can consider this a crisis or more of a crossroads. I guess that at the age of almost 22 would I have to worry about what I want to do with the next 40 years of my life.

"I don't wanna grow up, I'm a grown ass kid..." -Kanye West, Through the Wire

I believe that's how that line goes. I dunno. But its a hot cd, so different than listening to the objectification of women in other rap songs and what not (not claiming that's all of them, but some). He's so different, but yet so accepted. I want to be like that, stand out from the standards but get recognized for being different, and innovative. My goodness, I am itiching to get into the music business. Music is what I love, that's what gets me going in the morning and calms me down at night. It's my life force, and gives me the inspiration to write. Like I'm doing now. It feels kinda strange to actually be posting an entry. Things seem so hectic in my life, but yet so slow going. I am definately in a crossroads in my life, and I'm afraid of the outcome(s) of my decision. So the best thing to now is to put my faith into my judgement and just see what develops.

But for now, I got a paper to finish and to study for. I'm still on my mission. Just trying to do what I gotta do.

catching up on all the F5 posts:

the 2/6/04 friday five:

1. What's the most daring thing you've ever done? Dance on top of the bar the weekend of my 21st birthday. :P

2. What one thing would you like to try that your mother/friend/significant other would never approve of? Earning some Jerry Springer beads.

3. On a scale of 1-10, what's your risk factor? (1=never take risks, 10=it's a lifestyle) Um, a 5?!

4. What's the best thing that's ever happened to you as a result of being bold/risky? I got some cool points for it (see #1). My friend that was with me didn't believe that I would get up on the bar and dance, cuz I said it so many times before that night.

5. ... and what's the worst? Being perceived wrong for what you did/want to do (see #2). I am not trying to be one of the Girls Gone Wild chicks!!!


and the 2/13/04 edition:

1. Are you superstitious? Not really.

2. What extremes have you heard of someone going to in the name of superstition? My Mom- to her placing your purse on the floor means you won't have any money.

3. Believer or not, what's your favorite superstition? The one mentioned in #2 and the one where if you put an open umbrella above your head indoors will mean that you will have bad luck. I tried it once, and its fun opening an umbrella in the house. My Mom didn't seem to think so--I got busted.

4. Do you believe in luck? If yes, do you have a lucky number/article of clothing/ritual? Yes, I believe in it at times. 702 is my number, then again that's my birthdate. :)

5. Do you believe in astrology? Why or why not? They're good for entertainment purposes, but I don't swear on them all the time. Sometimes, your horoscope can be so dead on, but other times it can be way off too.


and as for 2/20/04 and the rest- I'll post them soon.

Once again, its been months and Sundays since I've placed an entry to this site, but I couldn't let this one topic slide:

WCPO Employee Arrested


What's the deal with all these sexual predators in Cincinnati?! I understand it's everywhere it seems like, but there's been a surge in reports on the news about these sexual predators lurking in such public places like grocery stores and chain stores like Wal-Mart and Target. Now, there's a news reporter that's a part of the mix?! It's definately a damn shame.

Talk about a big takeover:MSNBC - Cingular agrees to buy AT&T Wireless I am so sick of Cingular and their contracts. I've been actively thinking about changing my carrier, but keeping my number. I just want a good phone.

More entries to come soon; this is the busy part of the quarter- life has caught up with me.